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[Humor] - Shopping Mall crowd - Decoded



Staring shotguns - They are everywhere, one blaring stare, followed by next. Desperate uncles, jobless shoppers, housewives, nice-looking girls, security personnel, sweeping staff, staff from branded showrooms where even a housefly would hesitate to visit and not to forget the maniacs who peep into the toilets they can’t use. Did you know that the latest fad for a picnic spot for school kids is ‘visiting an overcrowded mall?


You stare like this, stranger? 



Here is my answer. Digest this!


Clumsy kids - Kids running around with shopping trolleys in the madding crowd are a regular phenomenon in malls, especially when their moms are busy buying lipsticks and Kajals. Some kids do acrobatics by running in the opposite side of the travelators, which makes you want to hit the kids’ careless parents heads with a hard rock. Yes, one has to blame the grownups for such unbothered attitude. I feel bad for those parents who let go of their kids and later find them via announcements in bad English.

Kids do this even at the mall


Amused aunties – Pairs of iridescent eyes peering at you, only to realize you saw them, would make up the stare into an alert smile. That awkward moment, how freaking horrible! Run! Hide!

Grumbling Gluttons – I hate when people stare at my food, especially, when I am licking down the dead set delicious butter scotch praline ice-cream at the mall’s best ice cream outlet. All these gluttons appear from nowhere, this bunch of hungry log heads look at your ice cream and drool as if they never saw food for decades. No, I don’t pity them. Not a chance!



Otherworldly couples – Newlyweds, PDA* lovers, Young lovers, they are in a different world altogether. Yes, of course, I understand all that mushy stuff going on, but they cannot topple my shopping bag and break the ketchup bottle in it. After all, who is the one that is embarrassed in the end? Me! They just go on with their xoxos!!! Grrrrrrrrrr! There is another thing which they find romantic – swooning as they go up the escalator/ travelators on their loved ones. An ultimate #facepalm moment at the mall this is.
OK. OK. That is enough!

Window shoppers – These are carefree shoppers like me. We don’t disturb anyone. We don’t buy anything; unless there is a dire need to buy something and it is salary day. Every mall in every city needs us; we bring prosperity and good luck. We create a palatial aura.

Brand babes - You do not want to bump into one of these babes, neither do you want to unknowingly eavesdrop when they are talking to their boyfriend/ husband/ partner/ friend. Everything except their language is branded.

My reaction when I step out of the mall

*All pictures are sourced from Google
* PDA - Public Display of Affection


That's all folks! I tried to bring in some humor element in my posts for the first time by adding GIFs. Hope you like it :)

Comments

  1. :) hahahahaha.. yeaaaaa... window shopper :P
    v

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    Replies
    1. Hahahaaaa ... Yea... You too right? ;)

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  2. Lol :P loved it... Apt pics too :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Aishuuu :) happy you visited my bloggy :)

      Delete
  3. Hope you like it? I loved it. This staring business – We thought it happens only to us because we are coming from USA. It happens in Chennai a lot. In such case, I go straight to him/her (and ask in Tamil) “How are you doing? Everything OK with you”. Almost 100% of the time, they just turn and walk away.

    Another one I want to add is these people want to listen in on other people’s conversation. In shops, I have noticed when me and my wife are talking, I have seen people very visibly listening to our conversation.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yayyyyy glad you loved it SG , more than glad in fact :) thank you...
      You got some guts I must say. These gossip mongers are so annoying ://

      Delete
  4. One more thing. When guests are at home, and the phone rings, the home owner picks up the phone and talks for a few minutes and hangs up. Every guest is looking at him wanting to know who called. Some even ask who that call is from.. Worst yet, the home owner volunteers -- Hi Hi HI en friend sundaresan kooptaan. Avunukku konjam panam kadanaa venumam. (Then a whole new discussion starts if Sundaresan is an honest guy and the merits and demerits of giving loan to a friend.)

    A relative of ours was visiting USA and staying in our home for a few days. I got a phone call and I had a conversation with the caller. When I hang up, the guest asked “yaaru phonela”. My wife was also there. I replied to him it was my girl friend.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. But it is appreciable that 'kadan' nu sonnakapramum they continue the conversation. Some people vanish after hearing that word. My dad always mockingly says "po da nu solarthuku badhila konjam kadan ketta avane pesama poiduvan' heheee :)

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  5. Heightssss! Paavam Mr.Sundaresan, avare decimate pannirpanga polarke?!

    ReplyDelete
  6. ahh the staring ones ... what should I say... now I feel strange why people aren't staring... am I so normal :P :P
    loved the ending - when you say posh except the language, totally agree with it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol haan, it never happens that people aren't staring these days. Even in traffic signals they look at other people, other people's cars/ bikes/ wives ufff it is beyond belief :/

      Yea Princess, the posh ones are posh until they open their mouths :P :D
      Thank you Princess :)

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  7. Note that this Omega Planet Ocean 600 Origina Replica Breitling For Women, as its name suggests, now enjoys the name of Master Chronometer. This is one of the very first Rolex Submarine to fulfill the drastic criteria defined by METAS.The Ocean Planet is one of the most 1:1 Replica Rolex Watches of all divers.After seducing generations of gentlemen, she turned to the female Hermes handbags with beautiful rose gold models.

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